God talk now I’ve overtold the story to this point and I’ve lost where it was that we were at
the question is treacherous you up ? banal allure of a trifling... the leather skin, preternatural whatever history we have left : racks on racks on racks as yet the part I left out until yesterday the sturdy and dazed part I left town about the part where she held my carriage my crested bassinet or dangled it above moving Sunset boulevard traffic screaming fuck you at every passing baffled go by vehicle and sobbing Maafa, you come all the far way back from chattanooga for that slow yellow thrill or was it fast to the point where by the time we got back to the car and she paused with unlocked doors to check the map the two bright black men with happy guns who got in and drove us around yelling how come you have these black babies screaming how come you got these frayed saddles for saviors you’ve got money? you’ve got money! And lifted the white Chevy out from under us those beautiful thieves who saved our souls that night and I never got to thank them or sensed the tension between two modes of survival that their shy guns and me and mom, she drunker than ever, us huddled on the sidewalk outside the police station gates that night alleviated There is nothing anyone can take from me There is nothing I can’t have But all this having has demanded equal wanting How much I must have wanted a bright black honor in the front seat to drive us on home that evening A safeplace mistaken for rage that perfect seeping night when violence wasn’t a crime but an intervention on my behalf a mis en scene angry gods sent to save us There is nothing anyone can take from me There is nothing I can’t have They went to jail they ended up behind bars walking muscular circles in a square cage I wonder if they remember my prayer my prayer my prayer my prayer my prayer
