Friday, March 20, 2015

Jeunesse / On Vanity

I'm better than several  Junes and O'Hara's subtle jinxes    swooning   in the casual  mule/rink   of  too many unions   fucked  into rank  and/then                     god mentions how the very fact of  being human is incriminating  —   black   rapture Rothko's / Africa /  maroon on red       What weapons are left to use against the invisible  /    Imma be a singer  into the            yessuah sweet daddy sungod suh

I don't want to be too thorough   anymore      that was bullshit /  bold glow    of    the sad  toreador   incidental matador (show up as your mother, or)  who  stole his slow  mount from    the moving  picture  circles /  reel, real, worse than true    these    movements  are rehearsed  like       abandonment   again  and   again   in my  sandbox,   Papa,         don't stop   at catharsis

How did I miss that the neutered one was bi-polar, his elegance for a mask   his indifference for a package deal  his satisfaction for his blackness      I crave chicken bones and weave at that steeplechase/opera/  but act all meek about  area rugs falling into the juke box     How did I overlook the abuse    and feel loved    again     so beautiful

I'm so beautiful
is it because I'm so beautiful